Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Its Raining Men

Specifically, bankers.

The latest jump was off JP Morgan's 30-story office building in Hong Kong yesterday.

It looks like he gave a good push.  He cleared the sidewalk and three lanes.  Not a good PLF, but hey, it was his first try.


ZH has the story and the tally:

Jan 26: William Broeksmit, Deutsche Bank AG
Jan 27: Karl Slym, Tata Motors
Jan 28: Gabriel Magee, JP Morgan
Jan 29: Mike Dueker, Russell Investments
Feb 3: Ryan Crane, JP Morgan
Feb 18: Lee, JP Morgan

Why?  At a detriment to myself but a bonus to my former employers, I've always taken ownership of my responsibilities and have often pushed harder than I should.  Yet I've NEVER had a job that inspired an alternative to the elevator.

Some of these suicides could be tied to stresses outside of work.  At least one is likely tied to a woman.  (Or maybe two women.)  So do we read into this new found enthusiasm for gravity?

Here are the theories that come to mind.  (I refuse to delve into these further until more facts are known.)
- They see projections that spell the end of times.
- They see massive layoffs in the near future.  Maybe they will have to initiate the layoffs.  No doubt firing multiple co-workers can be more stressful than getting fired yourself.
- They saw Microsoft Excel displaying "(Not Responding)" one too many times.
- The company firewall blocked them from going to CommieObama.com to buy a cool hat.

Any other ideas?

And completely unrelated: Have you seen our Precious Metals videos?

UPDATED 2.24.14 9pm:

ZH reports layoffs coming to JP Morgan by the thousands.

Theory #2 above seems to hold water.  Announcement expected tomorrow.

UPDATED 2.25.14 9am:

ZH's headline this morning:   JPM to Lay Off 17,000 Mortgage Bankers in 2014 and 2014, Because of the "Housing Recovery."  2014 cuts expected to be 7,500.

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