Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Commie Jokes

David Frum at the NRO has posted a few communist jokes in his diary. Here are our favorites:

What do you call a Soviet quartet that goes abroad? A trio.

Three men in a Soviet labor camp are sitting around the barrel stove one night and the subject of what they are incarcerated for comes up. The first one says: "I am here because I voted for Comrade Petrov in 1934." The second one says: "I am here because I voted against Comrade Petrov in 1934." The third one says: "I am Comrade Petrov."

A Frenchman, a Brit, and a Russian are admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. The Frenchman says, "they must be French, they're naked and they're eating fruit." The Englishman says, "clearly they're English. Observe how politely the man is offering the woman the fruit." The Russian notes, "they are Russian of course. They have nothing to wear, nothing to eat, and they think they are in paradise."

There was the Russian who bought a car and was told it would be delivered ten years from the purchase date. "Morning or afternoon?" he inquired. "What does it matter?" asked the salesman. "The plumber is coming in the morning."

In the 1980s the Soviet leadership decided to open a strip club in Moscow. It was a miserable failure. The commissars in charge of the project were sitting in a meeting pondering what went wrong. One said, "It couldn't be the food. It is as good as what goes into the Kremlin." Another lamented, "It couldn't be the vodka. It is the best made in all Russia." A third said, " It couldn't be the strippers. They all have been loyal Party members since 1942."